Install me

I am not at all interested in your program.

I have plenty of my own problems and a long list of tasks. I only visited your site because of unverified rumors that your program would solve all my problems. Please forgive my skepticism.

If eye-tracking studies are correct, I’ve already read the headline and am scrolling through the page looking for the blue underlined link Download Now. By the way, if I accessed this page from a browser running on Linux and my IP is from Canada, it can be assumed that I need the Linux version from a North American mirror, so please don’t ask about that. I understand that the file download dialog will open immediately, so I’ll send this thing to my downloads folder and continue reading.

When performing any action, a person analyzes the cost-benefit ratio. If your program drops below an acceptable level of quality for even a second, I will immediately discard it and find something else. Immediate reward is where the power lies.

The first barrier is the mindset. Think it’s not a big deal? So take a look in your downloads folder. There are plenty of .tar and .zip files, right? Which part of them did you unpack? How many have you installed? For example, only a third of them serve any purpose other than being ballast for the hard drive.

Even if I want to receive home service, I do not wish for you to enter my house without an invitation. Before entering the install command, I would like to know exactly where you plan to place your data. This is my computer, and I want to keep it organized as much as possible. I also want to be able to uninstall your program the very second I become disappointed with it. Suspecting that this is impossible, I simply won’t install it. My car runs smoothly, and I want it to stay that way.

If your program has a graphical interface, I would like to perform some simple task and see the result. The “wizards” won’t help here because they do things I don’t understand. It is highly likely that I will want to read or write a file. I don’t want to create a project, import directories, or give you my email address. If everything works, let’s move on to the tutorial.

If your software is a library, I continue to read your webpage in search of a brief beginner’s guide. I need something like “Hello, World” in five straightforward lines of code, and for the result to be exactly as described on your website. No huge XML files or templates to fill out – just a single source code file. Don’t forget, I also uploaded your competitor’s product. Yeah, the very one who keeps going on all the forums about how much better his product is than yours. If everything works, let’s move on to the textbook.

You do have the textbook, right? In a language I understand?

And if the tutorial mentions my problem, I feel encouraged. Now, when I read about what I will be able to do, it becomes interesting and even exciting. I lean back in my chair and sip tea – did I mention that I live in Canada? Now I will play with your examples and try to learn how to use your creation. If it solves my problems, I will send you a thank-you letter. I will also send bug reports when the app crashes and suggestions for new features. I will even tell my colleagues that your program is better than others, even though I haven’t tried your competitors’ programs. And all because you paid such attention to my first tentative steps.

And how could I ever doubt you?